Catching up

I can't believe it has been a week since I posted last - especially since I have been mentally composing this post for the whole week thinking I would get to it each day. Let's see if I can get this done and actually posted (I didn't - it is now more than a week).

First of all, work has been exhausting. Not so much the working part of it, but the fact that I try to have LB napping while I am working so that means I don't usually get one. I wake her up earlier than she wants to be up, put her back to sleep about 9:00, wake her up at 11:30, play with her until 1:00 and then attempt to nurse her back to sleep. I hate her being on a schedule and not being able to sleep whenever she wants. What other time of life can you do that? She shouldn't have to grow up so early. It has also effected how well we EC because I am too tired to be fully in tune with her and she doesn't signal as much because I am not responding as well.

Speaking of EC'ing, I had a few people ask how she communicates that she has to go potty. Over the week, I have realized that I have used two main ways of predicting that: timing and her cues. If she seem just a bit agitated and it has been a bit (2o min or more?) I will offer her the potty first. If she goes I give her a big, "Yea! We went pee pee in the potty!" If she gets more upset and stays that way for more than a couple of seconds then I will go on to something else. If I catch her peeing when not on the potty, I will at least make a ssssss sound (I will make this sound as she goes in the potty too). Some of the ways she looks a bit agitated are: going from smiles to fussy sounds, pulling off the nipple while nursing, and not content to be in a sling. I am having a harder time catching her poops. She will sometimes signal me the same way she does when she needs to pee, but just as often my only clue is that she becomes quiet and looks off to one side. If I put her on the potty and say "pooooooop" (like a grunting sound) sometimes she goes and sometimes she will go . . . in a few to 20 minutes. I just don't have the patience for that. For now, I put her in what I have started calling her "favorite pooping chair". It is a little seat with a mobile arching over her. I think it is like reading a book for us adults - she looks at the mobiles, relaxes and out it comes. I will watch her and say "pooooop" as she goes. I'm not sure how I am going to transition her to a potty yet.

How is that for going on and on about bodily functions? Who would have thought?

On to other things . . .

Does anyone know anything about Great Wall adoption agency? I have a friend looking into it. What is one thing you would tell someone just starting to explore adoption? Thanks in advance for any thoughts / advice for my friend.

Next:

Some thoughts on my mind tonight:

• It is an anniversary for Brad and I. Fourteen years ago today I realized we were great together. He is coming home tonight from Salt Lake City. I can't wait to go pick him up. I am smiling because I will be taking our daughter with me. This is another "this time next year" reminder - picking Brad up at the airport with a child.

• Two years ago today, I miscarried at home. It was our second miscarriage and I thought it was better to let things happen naturally. That night, I changed my mind. A d&c is quick and easy. I will spare you the details, but that night I lost enough blood that I thought I was going to die. Seriously. The bleeding had stopped (thanks to some herbal remedy from my midwife - I should have called her sooner), but Brad had woken me up after a couple hours to make sure. I was light headed because of the blood loss and having just woken up. I told Brad that I was going to die and he didn't believe me. I remember thinking how sad it was that I was going to die and Brad would realize it too late. Of course, I was fine and Brad could clearly see that. Now I think it is funny. Especially when I called the hospital and woke up the OB on call who told me I was fine. I thanked him like he just saved my life. Lesson learned though. If I ever need to make that choice again (not to tempt the fertility gods here), I will choose the d&c - in and out in under 4 hours and feeling fine the next day. It took weeks to recover from the miscarriage. Proof that "natural" isn't always better. However, in my case at least, natural is much cheaper. The d&c cost us about $1500 out of pocket.
  

• I'm tired, but I'm happy.
  

Next:

Lanie at Fertile Fantasy has nominated me for a Pink Rose award. She is another DE blogger who has just found out that her cycle resulted in a BFP and may even be twins. Take a moment, if you will, to pop over and congratulate her.

The idea behind Pink Rose award is to honor a person who has inspired someone (or needs to be inspired), or because they’ve encouraged someone in some way. I feel very honored to be chosen by Lanie.

I am going to pass this on to a couple of bloggers that have meant something special to me. Heck, I think I could pick at least 20, but time is short so I am going to nominate just two.

1) B at The Shifty Shadow. She also lost a child late in a pregnancy and like me it is taking her a long time to have that healthy baby. Not that having a healthy baby ever replaces the first one who was also much loved, but I believe - and it has been my personal experience - that having a living child to care for does help heal those wounds. My heart aches for her as she continues on this journey. She is also the most amazing writer. Everything she says is so eloquent - I can't even describe it. Pop over and read a few posts, but be prepared to need some kleenex and to leave feeling thoughtful.

2) Lori at Weebles Wbblog. I have nominated her before, but she still pops into my head pretty often. She has the most amazing relationship with her childs first mom (birth mom). Whenever I get nervous about raising a non genetically related child or maintaining a relationship with LB's donor, I think about her and know we will find out way.

If you would like to nominate someone for a Pink Rose award the details are below. Please note that you do not need to be nominated first. Of course, some of us take a little more prodding.

Here's what to do:
1. On your blog, copy and paste the award, these rules, a link back to the person who selected you, and a link to this post: http://smartone.typepad.com/smartone/2008/05/pink-is-my-favo.html. You will find the story behind the Pink Rose Award and other graphics to choose from there.
2. Select as many award recipients as you would like, link to their blogs (if they have one), and explain why you have chosen them.
3. Let them know that you have selected them for an award by commenting on one of their posts.
4. If you are selected, pass it on by giving the Pink Rose Award to others.
5. If you find that someone you want to nominate has already been selected by someone else, you can still honor them by posting a comment on their award post stating your reasons for wishing to grant them the award.
6. You do not have to wait until someone nominates you to nominate someone else.