I was dying in the dessert for lack of water. I longed with my whole being to quench my thirst. I dreamed of the day when my need would be fulfilled. I hoped again and again and survived disappointment when the water proved to be a mirage.
Now I am drinking from a fire hose.
How is that for balance? More like feast or famine. It is crazy how life works.
The good news is that Brad's mom died. It is sad and there is a lot of never-to-be-resolved issues between Brad and his mom. She wasn't a horrible mother, but she wasn't a very good one either. Her sister once said, "(Brad's mom) is just like me, she doesn't like kids." More than that, she was almost always negative and unhappy and did very little to change that. In fact she fostered it. She hated winter and spent the last winter of her life - knowing she would likely die before Spring - in a cold house rather than turn the heat up. She could easily afford it. For probably the first time ever, her house stays nice and warm so that those of us cleaning up and selling off stay comfortable.
All of this reminds me that now is the time to enjoy life. It is of course easier during times of feast than times of famine, but it is still too easy to forget how lucky I am. It is my nature to see what is missing. Lately, I have been much better about seeing what I have.
Becoming Kiera Knightley
6 hours ago