I feel very short on free time these days. LB continues to nap very little and when she does I am either working or trying to nap with her. I miss time to do what I want, but it is not the season for that.
LB is napping right now and I am taking a few minutes to post some thoughts.
First and foremost Kate at It's Either Sadness or Euphoria is experiencing both right now as her level II ultrasound revealed she is having two girls and one has a heart defect that will at least require surgery and may take her life. You would think the universe would consider over five years ttc, 7 IVF cycles and successful pregnancy with donor eggs enough for one couple, but the universe clearly doesn't give a damn. Please go over and offer Kate your support.
Secondly, I have had this strange shift in the way I view myself. I find surprised when I look in the mirror at how dark my hair is, how narrow my nose is and especially how old I look Sometimes I catch my side view as I walk by a mirror - not intending to notice - and I do a double take: Is that me? Really? Oh, I look so much like my sister. I wonder if it is because I look at LB all day and at some level I expect that I should look like her. Her hair is light, her nose more broad and clearly, she is much younger. These aren't sad moments, just odd.
Finally, just because I am the same weight as I was pre-pregnancy does not mean I am in the same shape. Oi! Swimsuit shopping was not pretty. Not. Pretty. At. All. I prefer bikinis because I like to feel the sun and water on my body, not because I think my body is all that. It isn't, in fact, and I want a suit that doesn't make it look like I think it is. Fortunately, if I suck in my tummy (I know that is so obvious, but I can't not), I am quite pleased with the suits I got at Athleta.com. I shopped their sales rack, ordered three and will be returning one. With shipping both ways, I don't think I will pay more than $40.00 for each suit and it beats the heck out of going to the mall. I am very much hoping I will be more active this Spring than I have been all Winter.
That's all for today. My time is up.
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3 comments:
Morning, I have been quiet and am catching up today. Thanks for the link to the swimwear.. I am not big on mall suit shopping either!
I am still 20 pounds heavier than my prepregnancy weight (which was 30 pounds heavier than I needed to be), and I often do a double-take at the woman I see reflected in a window. It just isn't me. I often lament the loss of my waist. I used to have an hourglass shape, and now I look more like a sausage. Of course, I don't lament the child who gave me this waist, but I wonder, why is it so easy for everyone else to drop those pregnancy pounds, and I am still struggling to reach that half-pound every week almost 11 month later.
I forgot to mention--that upon meeting you--I was blown away by how very YOUNG you look. Seriously.
Me, on the other hand??? I have such an old and wrinkly face now!! Totally worth it, but weird to see myself.
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