Today is Tuesday. As in just Tuesday. It isn't XDPO (days post ovulation) or even XDP5DT (days post 5 day transfer). It is just Tuesday.
At least I keep telling myself that. This is my easy cycle. The one where I don't get my hopes up.
I am getting my hopes up.
I'm trying my best to enjoy the possibility without getting too invested, but I'm not sure I haven't crossed the line. It's kind of like buying a lottery ticket. You don't really expect to win, but it can be fun to dream about what you would do with the million dollars if you did. Of course, at $1.00, the lottery is pretty cheap entertainment for a few days.
It is just Tuesday. I couldn't even tell you how many days post transfer I am (4) or how many days until the beta (5). It is just Tuesday.
I will admit to hearing the siren song of the HPT - the draw to test only to be crashed against the rocks of a single pink line. I thought I would be spared it this time around, maybe only testing the morning of the beta so I will be prepared for the BFN. Sadly, I hear them calling me already. Today, in a moment of insanity, I tore apart the bathroom cupboards looking for the two left over home pregnancy tests I swear I have. I would ask Brad if (where) he hid them, but I don't want to admit I have been so tempted.
I found the ones we used when LB was conceived. Our first positive was 11 DPO. It was a very light line so it would be overly optimistic to test before then
It's all good. Really, it is. If this doesn't work, we get to try again with my eggs in September. Belinda is excited to get to donate again too. We still have one more (and much better) chance at a sibling. But still, it would be really nice if it worked this time around.