Thursday, May 28, 2009

Will our good luck hold?

Last night after we settled on our TTC #2 plan, Brad said he was concerned about me. "Why?" I asked. "Because," he said, "you won't have anything to worry about."

I jokingly told him that I would think of something. Today, after having an odd, local rash for several months, I finally went to the dermatologist. It was asymptomatic so I wasn't really in a hurry to get it checked out. When the dermatologist suggested a biopsy and said it might be parapsoriasis I wasn't worried. I knew it was nothing, but I was tired of it hanging around and not going away as expected.

Then I got home and googled parapsoriasis. Now, I don't know if I have parapsoriasis. The dermatologist doesn't think the labs will be back for two weeks, when we should know more. But if it is parapsoriasis, it could be early stage (or lead to) cutaneous T-cell lymphoma which can't be good. It could also be one of those things that just goes away on it's own.

Damn Dr. Google and damn the two week wait.

After a quick break to take a call from the dermatologist I saw today (chosen at random and I really like her, thank goodness), I have some more information. The most important being that it is more likely than not to not be malignant and either way it is possible to treat it (in most cases) and continue with our plans for a sibling. If it is malignant, it is likely very treatable with no loss in life expectancy.

Years ago, I don't think this would have freaked me out so much. Years ago, I didn't really believe (even though I knew) that people died or that plans get horribly derailed. I am particularly possessive of our TTC plans as those dealing with infertility will likely understand and appreciate.

I have also been feeling very lucky lately. Our lives have completely turned around for the better since LB was born. It is hard not to be possessive of that and be extra vigilant toward anything that may threaten our good fortune.

I guess the good news is that I have enough information to keep me feeling positive and I have gotten pretty good at the two week wait. Additionally, as I type this, LB is just outside the back door banging the dog's water bowl on the deck. It is a delightful sound and I am looking forward to scooping her up and seeing how much water she has gotten on herself.

Now, if our good luck will only hold.

Edited to add that my FSH results came back within normal range (8.2 for those who like details). The good luck is holding so far.

10 comments:

dreamsandfalsealarms said...

Well, your LB luck is clearly holding! What is it with bodies and waiting two weeks!

battynurse said...

Yes it does look like your luck is holding. I hope the skin rash is nothing. I know what you mean about things that scare you and make you worry about stuff.

MrsSpock said...

Keep it up, Lady Luck! I think your plan sounds pretty good...

Sara said...

That's a good FSH level. I am the same way about worrying. Sorry that you're worrying about your rash. I hope that it turns out to be nothing.

Leah and Maya said...

You should have just left it alone and not looked it up, I know thats not realistic at all, but ehre you go something to worry about so Brad feels all things are normal.

dreamsandfalsealarms said...

Nice FSH!

musicmakermomma said...

I cannot believe it took so long to get you FSH levels back! What on earth were they doing with them?

I am so glad you have a plan and it sounds like we will do FETs together! Yay. My ET is possibly June 30 - have they given you a schedule yet? Would love to grab a decaf tea or something after b/w someday, let me know!

Peeveme said...

8.2! Wow , pretty good. Hope t the rash thing is nothing but I'm gldd you went into to get it checked.

Lanie said...

AWESOME fsh level! You rock!!!

And ... Damn Dr. Google! Hope its nothing.

Me said...

"damn Dr. Google"

Ditto that!